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Kanye West

"I realize that my place and position in history is that I will go down as the voice of this generation, of this decade, I will be the loudest voice," he said in an interview on Wednesday. "It’s me settling into that position of just really accepting that it’s one thing to say you want to do it and it’s another thing to really end up being like Michael Jordan."–Kanye West, 11/12/08, apparently so consumed with his own greatness that he has heard no mention of this man

“I’m No Hero” Says local Hero

These are the battle scars Mark suffered when saving a group of abandoned kittens, meowing out a living in a dirty old shoebox from the mangled, rabid jaws of a deranged alley dawg. After suffering the bite to his mouth he wrestled the dawg to the ground, forced it into submission and reasoned with it through telekinesis. After a short stroll to the corner store for a half gallon of low-fat soy milk, Mark, the kittens, and the dawg all enjoyed a nice life-affirming drink before Mark continued his quest to save the children of a burning orphanage who, he had learned a few minutes prior to saving the kittens, were trapped in the orphanage’s attic. Godspeed, Mark Carlson. Godspeed!  

 

Conversations with Elza, Part II

Onarga: You’re the kind of girl that exists in film noirs of the 40’s, the kinda girl with the smart mouth that gets every man around her running some errand for her that they know is gonna get them killed but for whom they gladly risk it. Then you laugh if they fail to accomplish the feat and sigh with boredom when they succeed.

Elza: maaaaaybe, though you’re exaggerating. but thanks.

Onarga: I just called you the kinda woman that gets men killed and you thanked me for it.*

Elza: Yeah, I know. I despise people who don’t see the beauty in bad quality and reach out only for the best. I think they’re semi-blind.

Onarga: You’ve given yourself a kinda license to steal then, haven’t you?

Elza: …You know what color Riga (the capital of Latvia) is? Grey. Grey is definitely the colour of everything here.  Ahhh, the smell of the soviet aftertaste…

Onarga: I feel like we’re co-writing a really terrible detective novel right now

Elza: I’m okay with that.

 *In my mind the conversation skipped from:

 “You realize I just called you the kind of woman that gets men killed and you thanked me for it?”

“It sounded like a compliment”

“It wasn’t”

“You sure about that?”

“Yes”

“Then you’re either a very good writer or an absolutely terrible one”

 scene.

My thoughts on our President and the Grant Park rally…

…have been summed up in song, a song entitled "I Drank The Kool-Aid" which should be avaiable soon for all to jamb, as it is a tasty one.

it is hereby dedicated to an idea of America long since abandoned, and specifically dedicated to those of you who were with us in the park the great night of Novmber 4th. Standing on my feet for 7 hours has never had such a payoff before.

Lates,

Onarga.

Thoughts on our new president soon to come…

The rally in Grant Park was too baddass and surreal to post anything about right now.

An explaination for the presence of hockey masks at a summer camp:

Jon:  oh right
how bout the trailer for the jason movie
 

Onarga:  have yet to see it
 

Jon:  it seems pretty sweet.
i think THAT movie will benefit form a remake
 

Onarga:  it just makes no sense to incorporate the hockey mask though
all those movies take place in the woods, in the summer, where teh fuck are they playing hockey?
 

Jon:   well… if you’re looking for an explaination for that…  i mean… technically the lakes freeze over in the winter which can have hockey played ON them which leaves hockey masks left dormant during summer, perfect for hiding your face when you’re cutting kids up
 

Onarga:   that makes sense on such a technicality
they’re summer camps, who’s there in the winter playing hockey?
Is that when the smart kids party at the camp?
 

Jon:  smart kids don’t play hocket
 

Onarga:   Are there no kids or murderers in winter?
if that’s the off season you’d think more of the films, or atleast one of them, would take place in winter
Or
Is the camp in the south and therefore never really getting a decent "winter"?
Making the hockey mask’s presense all the more quizzical
 

Jon:   no, i believe, as per the jason takes manhatten movie, it’s not south, persay… it’s relatvely close to NY… their trip isn’t that long, i don’t think.,
 

Onarga:  Huh
That’s a good point
But the surrounding areas by the camp always seem to hickville, not the sort of thing you’d find in the most rural poarts of New York state, methinks
How can we find out where Camp Blood is?
 

Jon:  i’ll find out
and actually. i think it actually was filmed in rural NY
at laeast on the east cost, NOT south
 

Onarga:   Filmed or that’s where it takes place?
 

Jon:  not sure
both maybe
but this site is gun
fun
ha
gun
http://campblood.shiversofhorror.com/

Onarga:  Camp Nobebosco in New Jersey
 

Onarga:  Clearly, they get winter then, and they seem to all be fuckign themselves by only visiting in summer
 

Jon:  right new jersey
and if you remember
the douchbag guy in 3 brings the hockey maskl
 

Onarga:  think of all they could do with some elaborate death scenes in the snow
Yes, true
But for what purpose?
 

Jon:  it’s part of his arsenal
 

Onarga:  Did these sad deluded people actually believe they were nto goign to be killed that first night or something?
 

Jon:  of tricks
to scare people
 

Onarga:   Ah
Well
I’m impressed
 

Jon:   hahahah
 

Onarga:  You really did explain the presence of that mask very well
Dammit

musings on “Rocking the Vote”

 

      My first real insight into politics and elections and voting and candidates etc carries with it the homely face of Megadeth’s Dave Mustaine suggesting that the early 90’s music listeners, who at that time liked to watch music on MTV, should go "Rock the Vote" and weigh in on deciding leadership in America. 
 
 
     Everytime i think about voting, i think how weird it is that this long haired pale faced drug addict stoner with a serious ego and "smarter-than-you" attitude and absolutely no business being an “election correspondent” introduced me to the idea that, while at the time i wasn’t able to vote.. that i should be interested.
 
     Can you say… “Countdown to Extinction”? how about…. “HOLY WARS”!!!
 
     so i voted today… for guess who?  if you want the answer and the reasons why… feel free to suggest i make my case publicly… here on this blog at least… which is public, yet still manages to be exclusive… like the Bush administration…
 
     remember  folks, you don’t have to win the vote to actually BE president… let GWB be a beam of hope if Obama happens to not with the vote… there’s still a chance he could just ‘decide’ to be president anyway!
Do you think George considered himself to have "Rocked the Vote" after that little sharade?
 
 
 
 
 
 
   

well… shit… i said it, dind’t i?

Stand and be counted

I didn’t just rock the vote this morning, I melted it’s fucking face.

total wait time: 7 minutes.

Pre-vote jamb: Neil Young "Campaigner"

Post vote jamb: Tool "Hooker with a Penis" as dedicated to John McBush and Bible Spice

Onarga.

Grant Park Celebration!

Well, it looks like 50% of the Johns managed to score tickets for the Obama’s Grant Park celebration, holla!

The weather looks like it will be a glorious 60 degrees or so with a chance of Revolution.

See you there, kids.

Onarga